A toxic person will always blame you for their bad behavior!Â
IWill blogs
First, she said me 10’s of things, compared me to humiliate me, reminded me of how much I “owe” everything to her, insulted me in every possible way, and then after some time, said that I fight, that I misbehave, that I am the problem!
First, he hit me, he was angry that I was “talking” back at him, He lost control because how could I not see, or care that he was frustrated and infurious!
He was failing in life, getting into problems, facing issues because of his mismanagement but all happened since I came in his life, he was distracted, I nagged, I was really the reason why all his problems existed!
She made me look bad in front of our parents. She accused me that i was the selfish one, I was the one who had treated her poorly. I was a bad brother, only concerned for his “wife and kids”. And then she blamed me for being isolated, when I was tired of the attacks and made my space then she said, how this proved I was wrong all along the way as she said!
No, you don't know anything. You really have little knowledge. This work sucks. Ask anyone. And then later blaming me for my self-doubt, for being not as “vocal” in the office!
These are some of the examples from real patients and clients in therapy dealing with toxic people around them in their life.
The worst pain that most people have difficulty overcoming is the fact that toxic people get away with blaming others successfully for their bad behavior and convincing somehow through their manipulation, through the time they devote to create drama and uplift, other people, to make them feel special so that they attack the victim too and so they succeed!
So what should a person who has been suffering from their abuse, their manipulation, and real-world loss do in such cases?
Well two things:
FIRST is to seek emotional help if their insult, their attacks, their tiring ways of showing them superior and you as less, have gotten to you! It's important you heal from all that they have hurt inside you with their words, with their “GROUPISM”, with their insults, with their attempt to create self-doubt in you!
Second is you need to learn in therapy or yourself that their blame, their group’s blame doesn't matter. You need to assert for yourself, speak back to them, not let them have their way, draw boundaries and if possible, then cut the ties. They enjoy being toxic, they have no way to cover up their insecurities, and their blatant toxicity than to dump it on you! This is what they do because of who they are!
You are not harmed because of this. Their belief and people who want to side with the toxic person now, let them be! Doesn't matter
You need to heal, rise, speak up and just cut off from them!
Their toxicity shouldn't harm your mental health, your belief, and your goals! That's what matters