I am not lazy or moody. I was depressed. 

IWill blogs

It would be 11:00 am in the morning and it would be difficult for me to get up from the bed. 

Everyone around me would call me lazy, someone who has no ambition, someone who sleeps too much, someone who just wants to rest.

But in my mind, I wasn't lying down because I was lazy. 

I would be struggling with thoughts of why am I even alive. 

What should I do by getting up? 

What do I have in my life to look forward to? 

I would be cursing my self for being so incapable of making a happy life for myself.

I would be having no energy to even get out of the bed.

I wasn't lazy. I was actually struggling with depression.

When someone would make a social plan and ask me to be a part, I would just do anything to not go. I would be labelled as someone who doesn't care about others.

But in reality, I was hopeless within. I didn't know what I would do by meeting people, I would think that I would embarass myself.

I would also think that people will ask me things that will make me feel further hollow, further lonely and further remind me of my failures and setbacks.

I wasn't selfish. I was struggling with depression.

I was going through a lot of pain, lot of emotional hurt. I had been through so much in life in last few years, setbacks, no support, blame games, life issues that I had become broken. 

I was disappointed in people around me. When I started getting betrayals, I started losing my hope.

I joined IWill therapy on insistence of my brother.

It was in therapy that my therapist helped me heal myself. She helped me see the good in me that i had stopped seeing. 

My therapist listened to me without judgement. She wouldn't label me as negative, attention seeker or too sensitive. I was able to express myself, my pain, my thoughts, my fears in a safe space without having to fear about how will I be treated for sharing this.

IWill Therapy helped me to rethink my life's priorities, also therapy helped me lift the burden of past setbacks and too many expectations that I was carrying to weigh myself down.

Therapy helped me see my value without any validation, any success or failure and helped me see how I was valuable for just an, for just who I was...

Therapist also helped my family see the need for support, for understanding, for being there, for giving me time to heal, for understanding and not labelling.

Therapist made me see so many good things about myself that I started feeling so confident within me. I started loving me again and this was the biggest help. I started having hopes from me.

Now I would wake up without an alarm, look at myself and take care of me. I would now hold myself together and be with people who mattered. I was trying again to be successful, my morning was fresh, I had so much good happening....

When you label someone as being lazy, not social, careless, attention seeker, look within, could they be depressed? Were they cornered and isolated? Did they go through many things that broke them? Support them, stop labelling them. Seek therapy for them but also speak to a therpaist yourself, they might be going through the most painful disorder called depression and they need help, love, happy environment, not toxicity or labelling or isolation.

Megha Jain

If you too want to join IWill therapy. Please download the app from link below. The app will start with an automated assessment and accordingly pair you with the right program and best suited therapist for you. Recommend booking sessions immediately and start therapy. All sessions will be online and will heal you from within. If you feel mentally down, unhappy and your assessment on app suggests an issue, don't ignore or deny yourself the help available.