I fought my depression alone. No matter how many people I had, no one really understood me

IWill blogs

You are always upset. And always crying. It's very draining.

If you want to be like this, continue to be, I can't sit and make myself crazy like you too.

You are also lazy. You don't even want to try, this is an excuse.

It almost looks like you enjoy being in pain

Please dont do all this for attention.

Even if i have issues, but i dont act in this way.

This was the support I got, when I was depressed. 

No one around me wanted to take responsibility for my pain.

I was ignored, always made to feel secondary and the more I slipped in depression, the more I was blamed for my condition.

 

I felt even more heartbroken at the lack of empathy.

I was so lonely that many times I wanted that my life should just end, it has no meaning.

 

One day, I was thinking that I should not exist. And then I felt, why should I not exist? Just like others, I am also being so bad to myself.

Atleast I should have empathy for myself, even if it's hard, I should try to break this cycle of pain and do something for me.

The day itself I enrolled for therapy at IWill.

Therapist understood me and my emotions. She didn't blame or justify my tears. She accepted my pain and helped me process it.

 

Therapist helped me see myself and my future in a different vision. She helped me see the great about me, she helped me feel good, not blame me for my pain, but help me ways in which it could become less and less.

 

In therapy, I started taking small steps to meet people, to work, to be kind to myself, to share my problems with therapist and my insecurities and get a fresh perspective every time.

I had support now as I was making changes to my life and i had this conviction within me to survive, to rise from ashes.

I don't wake up crying anymore. I have a day I made for myself that I look forward to.

I don't expect others to wipe my tears, I have things in my life that keep me happy and i got my back.

I don't ask for support anymore. I am so strong that I can give many others the support they may need!!

I survived. I overcame my depression, when no one around me supported. I hope this is not something anyone's loved ones should do to them, it's isolating and goes against what family is

But if this happens, remember it's all the more reason, to survive and get back up, you didn't get a destroy it for others. Your life is for you and you deserve healing and happiness.