IWill 2021-01-26 12:04 - 4 minute read

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I was more pampered as daughter than anyone. Dont treat me poorly in marriage

IWill user

My therapist at IWill finally told me that I needed to speak my heart out to my husband’s family. That I should communicate fearlessly and not keep all the pain in!

And that’s when I asked his mom and sister and him to talk to me and I said I needed to speak and then I said,

I was more pampered as the daughter of my parents than even you Arun and I know you have seen this.

I studied in the same college as you,

I am as capable and as learned as you! Even if I wasn’t all that, marriage is a relationship of equals! I am your equal part. I am your partner!
And yet in this home, all of you have made me feel time and time again that I am less!

Whether it is when you ask me to cook alone or get up and do things, because I must... and he shouldn’t
Whether it is when you tell me I can’t call him what I want to, or that he can’t say sorry to me, as he is the husband
Whether it is when you try to make my parents look less important

Or whether it is ok things you keep telling me how men should earn more, how men have more rights. How men are superior and so on!

I want to tell you that I am here for love, for partnership, for pampering, for understanding I am not a Slave or maid, I didn’t marry for any of it, I didn’t marry to be an inch less than equal here!

I have been brought up with so much love and care... and if you can’t give me that, I want to tell you that I won’t allow you to destroy my respect in my eyes... I don’t see myself as less, I won’t allow you to make me feel or be this way too.!

I am his equal in law, in life, and no one has done a favor by marrying me...I am no orphan so please stop treating me like one!

I was heartbroken 8 months ago due to the treatment I was getting after marriage. I had never even in my dreams thought I would be made to feel so less in comparison to my husband, so less as a woman!

Don’t call him by name. Don’t call him tum.
Don’t say sorry to your wife. It doesn’t look good on you!
Don’t disturb your husband. He is working!
Don’t talk to him when others are around. It’s important to respect a woman!
You can’t go on a friend’s trip. Ajay is different!
We want a child now. Your work can wait...

I seriously was depressed listening and Be around all this... IWill therapy helped me come out of the pain, feel confident and not helpless, helped me stand for my rights to be... my Husband who was otherwise a mute spectator at least could see what I was going through and he stood with me!

I am glad I don’t allow anyone to treat me Poorly now or paint me as Inferior! I no longer allow them to inflict humiliation and inferiority pain on me!

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