I was tired. I was exhausted but I had to do it anyways. I had to rise back for myself

IWill blogs

Yes what I went through was worst kind of pain.

A bitter divorce, lot of insults and character assassination of me, fighting for the custody of my child, prior to that being in an emotionally empty relationship with only expectations and no support. Bread crumbs in terms of attention.

No career. No space for self. Just keeping a face fake in front of the world thinking it will work out or else I will be a failure in front of the world and who wants it.

And each day passing, I lost more of myself.

By the time all of this was happening, life felt like a burden. To me I felt like a waste and I had so much pain and hurt towards my own self.

I was exhausted. I was wanting to hide somewhere and never come out.

I randomly scrolling aimlessly through an instagram post and stumbled upon IWill Therapy. I don't know what made me give this a try, may be it was this desire to once just cry my lungs out to someone and scream all my pain out.

And I did. And she heard and empathise but she said one thing, she said I had every right to be happy, get back up.

1. What are these insults. Who are these people. This life is for me and I do the best for it. I live the best life for myself.

She said, I had to get back up, forget what people thought of me and remember the Sakshi. The person who I was. She helped me slowly find myself back again, push me to do more. 

She helped me to get back anyways like that was the only option. 

I got off social media

 I got away from toxic people, many relatives who reminded me of how insulting past few years had been for me.

I worked on my skills, I took a job, a rather small one but I dusted the shame.

I starred meeting friends who won't judge.

I stopped seeing myself from eyes of others or what might others think. We would be all dead one day anyways. Nothing was worth losing this moment. This life that I had 

And look at me now.

I am happy.

I am successful. Now in a new company at a senior position.

I am fitter mentally and physically.

I am back on social media. Attacks or eyes or what ifs don't trigger me anymore.

I am no longer tired. The more I walk ahead, the more I wish to keep going.

I push myself on bad days and find my good days.

I have not only survived this phase.

I have thrived and won.

And this is my story

I am Sakshi again, and nothing would stop me from keep going ahead now.

Yes, IWIll!!!!

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