IWill

IWill 2021-07-21 09:00 - 2 minute read

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It’s better to live alone than to live with people who isolate and cause you pain

IWill user

I was so broken. I was so scared to be alone.
I was so afraid of facing the big black world alone!
I was scared to have no one around me.
I was scared to die in isolation alone...

And yet at the same time, I lived in a place where no one cared I was there.
I was alone in everything.
I wasn’t supported, no one had any dreams for me.
I wasn’t loved. I was always made to feel like I didn’t matter. My emotions were destroyed everyday. I was intentionally ignored. I was ridiculed if I cry or express the need to be cared for.

I was stuck... I felt like both the worlds are scary for me. One that I am living in where I am isolated and other where if I leave this, I would be in. In the second world too, worse could happen. I could be more alone...

I felt unlucky... I was depressed. I was so tired of my life. I would curse myself, each day!

I joined iwill therapy one day to at-least cry to someone who would at-least listen to me! But in therapy, something happened... the therapist at iwill helped me understand step by step that rather than being in with people who didn’t care, I would be much better off if I make a life for myself...

I won’t be alone... I would have myself... I have dreams. I am intelligent and I can lead a good life!
I may be alone but my heart will be not burnt with abuses, ignorance, deep insecurities!
I will be probably alone but I will have some opportunity to change my life, to make a difference!
I won’t be and shouldn’t be at the mercy of anyone!
I was complete in myself!
I was anyways not being taken care of! Rather everyday damage to my emotional health was breaking my physical health too! I was dead emotionally, what was I fearing now?

Therapist at iwill gave me the strength to re-imagine my life and walk on it. The therapist at iwill helped me look at myself with strength, with love,  with compassion.

I wasn’t unlucky.! I was forcing a bunch of ungrateful people and a rotten situation on myself!

Therapy helped me find the answer! I was better alone in the driving seat than be in a car where I was being driven to pain again and again!

I have moved past and chosen to be alone, and become my own companion.

I joined a great job last month, I lead my life, enjoy, take long drives, nurture myself, take care of myself! I am glad to have found myself again! I am not alone! I am a force :)

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