IWill 2021-07-11 03:39 - 2 minute read

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Loneliness & isolation are the worst ways a loved one attacks your self-esteem and happiness

IWill user

I would be in that house forever waiting for someone to talk to me, listen to my pains, my hurt... I would be sitting in all conversations and yet none of those conversations were about me, or I was a part of any of these.
I was not part of any plans. Promises with me would be broken like they didn’t matter...

I would have no affection.
I would have no feeling like this was my home.
I had everything. There was jewelry, comforts, I didn’t have to cook. Everything was there but I was lonely...

Loneliness is a strange and painful feeling that one gets when no one around cares you exist. Your goals don’t matter, your wishes don’t matter. Your presence doesn’t matter. Whether you are feeling loved or ignored doesn’t matter.

Whether comparisons are hurting you don’t matter as long as they are pleasing someone else.
Loneliness is a pervasive feeling that sets in when your loved one/s show they have time or space for everyone else but just don’t have it for you. The meaning of life, of self changes...

My self-esteem was broken into pieces. I had no happiness... I had nothing to look forward to in a day... I had no motivation... I just had the pain of being irrelevant, being unneeded, being ignored, being inferior, and less.

I would cry and yet no one was there to even empathize or understand what was paining. There is no worse feeling than being lonely.

I started iwill therapy once I read a blog here on Instagram. And it was here that I understood I was already in depression and tremendous mental agony... in therapy, my therapist helped me slowly rebuild my self-esteem,  seek the support of others, my parents, friends as loneliness otherwise would drown me. She helped me focus on myself away from distractions of how others wanted me to feel.

Later my partner joined therapy too and he could see that avoidance, not having my place in the home was abuse that had broken me...

Loneliness, having no one who cares for you or a feeling that you don’t matter is worse than any other pain. It breaks your perception of self pretty drastically... never make your loved one feel like they mean nothing to you anymore.. it can break them forever

Loneliness can also be a mental condition where in no matter even when others try, we can connect to them. Sometimes it can happen because of toxic relationships. Many times its a byproduct of depression or other mental health issues. Whatever this might be, please seek therapy and help... 

You dont deserve to feel so LONELY, so not needed, so socially distant!

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