IWill

IWill 2022-05-13 12:58 - 4 minute read

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My husband abandoned me for ego & family drama! He did the right thing

Deepika Sahni

My husband and my discussion last time in his home 

I really like you but not more than my family.
You have problems here, you want attention from me but I have a family, I love them a lot, I am committed to them and I am not ok in taking away my attention from them. They are very important to me!
If you have a problem here, if you feel ignored and isolated, you can leave me.
My family is one of the best. If they say something to you, you must learn to respect them. Wouldn’t you do the same for your parents... if you are so upset, you can think of leaving me!


How I felt with all this 

My husband who I thought was the best thing that happened to me was saying this to me.
He had no empathy for my condition.

I would have treated his family like my own, if his family had given me basic affection, love, and understanding of my loneliness. How could I treat someone like my parents who was always attacking me, ignoring me, insulting me in front of people, comparing me and laughing over me in the group, asking my husband to always be away from me while I was in this home for him...


And my husband too, I never thought the person who claimed so much love for me would be so full of ego, would be so easily manipulated, would ask me to leave if I can’t adjust! Like I am not even a person...

And while I was choking inside my heart, I left that home... I wanted to come under a car but something stopped me... I cried, I cried.., I waited for my husband to call, but he didn’t... he was in ego...

I dropped him a message and he said I left home on my own. And I was free to come if I want... but that I had to change my “drama”...

I knew it was over... but my heart was aching... I was angry yet so weak...
I joined IWill therapy after weeks of darkness within...


It was in therapy that I learned to control my hurt. Accept what has happened and reflect on both choices going back and moving on... the more I looked within and things that had happened to me, the more I wanted to move on... I wanted my therapist to help me become resilient, to stay the course, to deal with the immense heartbreak and denial of losing a marriage in which you had invested the rest of life’s dreams. But the therapist helped me start a Job, look good, be out with friends, have trips, stay happy, cry but then get back up... she helped me deal with all the negative views I had on myself...

Husband did the right thing

And today here I am, working, happy, not being abused, not being a slave to someone else’s drama! Not crying, not starving myself to gain a person’s attention who ironically doesn’t care! No longer am I isolated and listening to things happening outside and crying that no one takes my name!!!

And as for my ex-husband, he is still the same. Alone, not having his own life, no career priorities, only proving to be a man of the family who is damaged and broken from within... how do I know? I know because as we were nearing divorce, he himself started asking for reconciliation...
To which I said, you did the right thing for me... thanks for that... so no reconciliation...

 


I am glad I could get the power to not lose my life but rise like a Phoenix and make a happy life for myself!

I hope marriages only happen when the man is committed to his wife.

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