What I got most hurt about, how I was seen and what my place in eyes of mu in-laws was post my marriage.
It was shocking because I had never imagined I would have to see or face this as a challenge.
My in-laws who are educated and elite of the society had an uncanny, repulsive superiority complex.
Their view point was a daughter in law is always supposed to listen, not have a mind of her own, should pamper in-laws including sister in law even If daughter in law is younger or more alone in this new setup and this was heartbreaking.
So I was expected to,
Take care and be empathise with in-laws but when i was in pain, it was always trivial.
I was expected to praise, talk about good things about my in-laws, and nor even one could be about me.
I was expected to not spend time with husband, husband was only for in-laws. My job and expectation from me was that I should spend my time with in-laws.
And the argument was, marriage is a family thing. Hello, it's between two indivduals first as the key, how could that be overlooked.
I make sure no one passes remarks on me. I don't take them.
I don't pamper others at my expense. I am not part of gossips.
I don't take moral judgements on my behavior.
I don't allow them to make me feel unworthy.
I don't take comments on my parents.
I focus on my career and growth too.