My in-laws manipulated my husband to make me feel completely ignored and hurt

IWill blogs

What my mother-in-law would keep telling my husband

 She is always talking to you, we are also there and she should respect that.

Every woman gets married, she cries all the time, which spreads so much negativity in our home

 Why does she always want to go out with you? You have changed so much and she is changing you

 She is always acting so childish, laughing, and doing silly things

 Why does she put so much makeup on? She doesn't look appropriate to be our daughter-in-law

 She is always demanding something or other from you, no one is like her

 I would hear my mother-in-law say this all and more to my husband.

He would first go silent, and then, to please her or to keep peace, remark on my need to wear different makeup, be differently dressed, stop talking to me as much, cancel my plans, and just be awkward in the home

 I came into this home with so much enthusiasm and happiness, and wanted to be happiest with my husband.

But with constant negative reactions to my presence, invisible Behavior towards me, my husband's ignorance, getting manipulated, and the negative home environment for me turned me into complete depression

 I was always sad and crying.

I was lonely and always felt humiliated and insulted

I felt so heartbroken that my husband could treat me and ignore me like that

 I would cry all night, and still my pain would be ignored as someone trying to spread positivity

I joined IWill therapy when I read an article that looked exactly like what I was going through

It was in therapy at IWill that I was diagnosed with severe depression.

The therapist had 5 sessions with me to help me process my environment better, to find a way to heal myself. And then she asked if my husband could join couples therapy

When he joined couple therapy first she helped him through role play in several sessions, feel and see how he would feel if all of this was happening to him

 If his pain was labelled as drama when he was in a new setup and attacked for being himself

 How would he feel if my family commented on his clothes, his fashion, to make him feel down

 How would he feel if he were in an environment that was mine, and I stopped talking to him as much, despite being his wife, his spouse

How would he feel if I were made to ignore him, and I ignored him to please my parents

What would this do to his self-respect and ego, and happiness?

How would he feel if he was trying to be at my place as his home, and he was attacked for it

And then through communication and empathy sessions, she helped him see what I go through daily.

My husband started seeing the patterns and how wrong his behavior was. My husband started seeing the pain I was going through, and changed and understood

 He would spend time with me. He would stop his mother if she commented on my looks, my smile, my needs. He would make sure my interests counted

 He would make sure I was never alone when sitting somewhere

He would take me out and love me, and would not let me cry

Therapy at IWill made him realise how unfair his setup was for me, and he changed it and stood for my happiness

The Worst pain is to be constantly attacked and denied your place in your own husband's life. I am glad this is changing now

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