Nothing more wrong than a man ignoring and insulting his wife to please others
He would ignore me to please his family.
He would take others' side wrongly and ask me to adjust, keep quiet, and say nothing to keep peace in the family.
He would talk to others while I am looking at him, sitting there waiting for him just to make sure others believe he is not in control of me.
He would ask me to ignore things said to me, insults given to me, remarks on my family, discrimination and hurt I got, to let go, to respect his family, to adjust till things get better, to not “blow things out of proportion”
He would talk to me when no one was around and would listen to me, but when in front of people or others, he would become just a different person, and if I questioned his duality, he would attack me as being overreactive, jealous, and completely make me feel like the problem.
He had selective time and attention for me. I was so confused with his behavior.
How it had impacted me
I had become completely humiliated.
Devoid of love, ignored, and yet in this home. My sense of self and respect were lost:
I felt completely dependent on others for happiness and that would never come to me.
I didn’t feel like doing anything because the injustice and my husband who was my own family, his indifference towards me would break me the most!
I joined IWill therapy and here I learned to prioritize for myself, to assert myself, to speak but to not cry and feel bad anymore.
My husband too joined IWill therapy And it was in therapy that he could see how wrong it was to ignore me, to hurt me, to be abusive, to please others.
Isn’t that being a sadist?
Why should others feel happy when I feel ignored?
Why did he marry me if he couldn’t stand for me in his home? Why did he take 7 vows of protecting me when I am most hurt and emotionally destroyed each day in his home.
He could understand that marriage is not about his dominance, it’s about our partnership
It’s not about making me bend and adjust, it’s about acceptance and joint effort.
It’s not showing me down but lifting each other up
Therapy at IWill helped us a lot.. I still sometimes I can’t forgive how I was treated but I am growing ahead of my pain.
At least the love now and no ignorance and standing up for me is making all the difference
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