IWill

IWill 2023-01-11 02:04 - 4 minute read

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People who are jealous of you will always attack you or praise others to isolate you. Never seek validation from them

IWill blogs

 

I got a promotion and they congratulated and praised some random relative in the family who had even "bigger" promotion.

I went out of my way to do something and no one even appreciated me. And in the same time, they would appreciate someone else who did little, a lot.

No one would ever encourage me. I would keep doing things to please and yet never hear slightest of good words for me.

On the contrary i would be attacked for smallest issues, spoken to very sarcastically and made to feel like I was always wrong or an outcast. 

I felt always isolated. I felt little and my self esteem was for a toss. I knew I was attacked but even after knowing this, lack of appreciation for me, was breaking me.

I questioned my self worth and felt insecure.

I faced such emotional pain due to this that it was breaking me.

I couldn't help but understand why are these people so nice to each other and so against me?

Why are these people always upset with me? Why do they pass these remarks? Am I really that bad and I am really not worth them?

These questions would plague my mind 24*7 and i would cry, I would feel stuck.

One day i saw a social media post by IWill and the story i was reading felt like mine. I was so desperate for help and someone telling me why was this all happening to me. I started iwill therapy and in therapy my therapist helped me see that people who may be not as secure or feel threatened or uncomfortable by someone, act in these ways out of insecurity or sometimes plain jealousy.

It was not at all a measure of my self worth.

She also helped me re-organise my company of people so that I consciously be around people who motivate and appreciate me. She helped me work on my boundaries and learn to assert, speak for myself when someone attacked me.

When someone was being thankless, have the courage to call the toxicity out assertively and without conflicting.

She helped me also develop a deep sense of self identity and appreciation that was not impacted by such attacks of people who didn't really mean anything.

I started relying on myself and my work.

I developed intrinsic validation mechanism for who I am.

I asserted and didn't let people attack me.

I succeeded more, did more good, was enjoying and being happy for my life.

 

And jealous people were so jobless now. They didn't know how to rattle or attack me. How to make me feel little.

 

I had safeguarded and worked to protect my mental health from the onslaught of assumptions. 

I am glad I started IWill therapy and stopped the cycle of self blame while understanding that some people have these behaviors to pur you down and how they are more a reflection of them, and not a testimony to your self worth.

 

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