IWill

IWill 2022-04-28 11:38 - 2 minute read

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People who need you to fulfill their emotional needs but isolate you, Don’t let them destroy you

Rita Singh

Their needs
Whenever they are down, they want you to appreciate them.
They feed you about other people who are this and that to them and expect sympathy from you.

They want you to say good words and motivational things to them whenever they are stuck in a problem.
They want you to give them the importance and prioritize them.

They want you to call them, be for them, make sure people who are important to them, and also get to see how you care for them.
They want you to do things for them, respect their pain, and not say anything that may hurt them!

And that’s fine. And you do...

But when it comes to you

It is the worst pain when the same people are so harsh and ruthless to you!

When you are upset and need them or someone else, they try and tell you to be strong and not be so weak. They don’t want to give you empathy. When you are upset, they compare you and belittle you.

Whenever you need someone to stand up for you, they are not there.

When you achieve something, they don’t feel happy!

When you need care and attention, they are usually the first ones to blame you, get irritable, or show you that you are asking for something too much.

The hypocrisy of how they see your emotional needs vs their own is heartbreaking, and people like me, who are sensitive... I was stuck and felt bad to be in an environment like this. It emptied me... and the whole narcissism to always want me to be available emotionally was traumatizing!!

I had been reduced to a person who should have no emotional needs.

I didn’t know the way out.
I didn’t want to be bad like them!
But I also didn’t want to suffer like this... I wasn’t here to undo others' trauma while gaining my own... I was there to get love and give love...

I joined IWill therapy...

The therapist at IWill helped me to heal myself, to not let their behavior undermine my self-worth.
She helped me stand and assert, speak when I felt like I was being treated hypocritically!
She helped me see that I had to prioritize myself. Being empathic doesn’t mean being ignorant of one’s needs or being ok with abuse... or discrimination

Through therapy at IWill, I learned to stand my ground, ay the right thing, show people the mirror without being rude or angry and also have a life of my own, my plans, and my goals.

I also made sure no one takes me for granted anymore... Good doesn’t mean letting people destroy you or be so blatantly insensitive to your needs.

Good means to be able to stand up for yourself too. If you are a family, in a relationship, your emotional needs are important too. Let no one deny them to you
 

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