Please stop getting married if you have no space for your partner in life. It's the biggest commitment. Don't ruin lives

IWill blogs

I have my family. I cannot give you time.

Why are you so demanding? I have work.

See marriage is ok but my friends are super important to me.

I don't want to share everything with you. Why do you keep asking ?

I don't want to take your advise on this. I am moving to a new city as it's great for my career.

 

I don't know why do you expect me to be there for you listening to your crying and nagging. You have to stop draining me.

 

I don't have time for this useless discussion. Spare me

 

You have to attend that wedding. You have to adjust. They are my people.

 

Sometimes you would come across partners who talk like this about and to their partner...

This is the level of distance and disconnect that they would be coming from.

 

But think about this for a minute

Can such ignorance be given to people who are your working for? Can you tell them you won't come to work or you have no time to work?

Would you see conversations like these happening with your closest friends?

If even that is unacceptable,

how come a partner who clearly has come into your life for marriage, for togetherness, for sharing life how can this become acceptable at all in this case?

 

It cannot because it clearly is not ok! 

No one give a woman or a man authority to take your most important relationship for granted because when you do this, not only does the sanctity of marriage gets compromised.

 

You also make the other person feel 

Betrayed as they came for love, not for ignorance.

It also gives them emotional damage, disappointment, insecurity and pain 

Scare and fear comes naturally not just for the moment but for life, what support would they have? Will they be always treated like this? Where does their life go from here ?

Suffocation of being unloved and if partner is unwilling to listen, a sense of being stuck!

What should happen if someone has gotten into a relationship where they treat their partner as less important or even secondary

Communication and openly sharing what is happening is important

 How this ignorance and denial is not ok is important.

Couple therapy is important. There is lot that needs to be seen from a partner's eyes and also what relationships are supposed to mean and do and at IWill, this is what we help lot of couples learn that wife and husband or partnership is one of the most important relationships in your life 

There is a need to realise that asking for 

Time is what the relationship is for, it's not taking you away from people you have.

Sharing each other's life is what marriage is. This is nor a relationship where it should be any other way 

Nagging is a wrong word when a partner speaks and communicates on an resolved issue. They live with you and it's their right to atleast have you listen to what you are ignoring.

Family is them, at the core now. There is no distinction..that distinction that they are outside the family is biggest lie and probably highly emotionally abusive as treatment or as pain.

If you can't feel happy in your marriage or if you both are struggling to form a bond, seek help. That is why we are here.

Couple relationship is one of the most beautiful relationships. Let it remain that.

For therapy at IWill, download app link from below, start assessment and book sessions with your paired IWill therapist or click "Start IWill journey" from top right corner