IWill 2021-10-03 11:17 - 6 minute read

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Signs your husband/wife is a narcissist and how to overcome the struggles

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Narcissist personality is just obsessed with self. Usually, it doesn’t stop at this. A narcissist initially creates an aura that charms a person, to be praised, to be seen as good, and then due to their inner insecurity, their obsession with superiority, control, and even jealousy, destroy the very same person they charmed, creating a very painful, toxic and vicious cycle for the loved one!

So how to know if your partner is a narcissist?

While people who have a narcissistic spouse do know that something is terribly off and experience mental pain, here are some of the signs to help better with this understanding

1. Seeing spouse completely as just there to make them happy

If a person’s spouse sees their partner nothing more than someone who just there to fulfills their partner’s needs, dreams, ambitions, to serve them at every second, every minute, completely ignoring their own needs, this is a sign that the person could be a narcissist

2. Attacking you out of the blue to make them feel good

Does your partner blame you for everything? Everything in their life is your fault? Your presence, your dreams, your choices to be with your loved ones, your friends everything is a fault! They can attack you anytime and do it so viciously that you are scared, and then they convince you with logic, blackmail or even drama that they are right? This could be a sign they are a narcissist!

3. Making you the scapegoat
To make themselves look good, they can even defame you, put the blame on you in front of others, make you the bad one! Unlike partners who try to defend each other, a narcissistic spouse to save their own image, would not take a minute to put the blame on their partner! This could be done either in a way that is manipulative to show how they are just sharing the truth or In blatant blame! this leads to strained relationships, a lot of pain, and hurt for the spouse!


4. Damaging your self-worth and your self-belief 

They would attack your work, they would belittle you, they would magnify your mistakes and show them over and over again! Anytime you do something good, you may not get praise from them! You may get cold vibes! You may stop sharing good things about yourself due to their intolerance! 

And this may even slowly push a partner into depression!


5. Giving you some affection randomly or constantly manipulate and gaslight you!

If you feel abused, you feel you have lost your happiness and at the same time, you crave their attention and love because of the one-off care they show for you or the way they manipulate you making you confused as though they are great people is another tactic!

If you have been with a narcissistic partner, you are getting the opposite of what you should have got in a Marriage!


You are losing your self-respect

You are completely living for someone else who doesn’t seem to be ever happy despite you destroying self for them!

You have lost your people and your relationships!

You have been subjected to torture and abuse and you are blamed for it!


You have a mental and emotional void, pain, and emptiness because of it! You are trapped, confused, and self-blaming! 

If this is you or someone you know, you need to start drawing boundaries immediately! You need to learn to stand up for yourself, find a way to put hurt behind and now live for yourself to! 

You can start therapy like most other narcissist abuse victims find great help in! Therapy can help you get stronger, learn how to draw boundaries, how to assert, how to lead your own life, how to stop their manipulation and gaslighting, learning to stay focused on self, find a way to put them and their influence in its place, get connected to your loved ones and have friends and life you deserve, to restitch your self-confidence, to help you see in a different light again! 

Narcissist abuse from a partner is and can be the worst! You have to recognize it, and break the pattern!

Love isn’t this one-sided, love is not abuse, love is not complains and anger, love is not constant attacks and belittling, love is not ignorance. This is narcissist abuse! And you need to get past it 

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