IWill 2022-07-29 02:43 - 2 minute read

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Some people are so good at manipulation. THEY convince the person who is suffering that they are the problem and it's their fault

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Oh why are you crying, that's why i don't talk to you, I am scared of the drama you do.

You don't know how to be happy, everyone tries to adjust but not you.

I wasn't rude at all. Look at you, you don't do as much needed, I am always the one doing and hence I told you, how tired I am. 

You have stopped caring, you are the one who has isolated and abandoned your family.

Why are you crying now. Don't be so sensitive. That was just a joke. One should be not so weak. I will be scared to even talk to you.

I hit you because you were behaving so strange, you were making me lose my cool, just look at your behavior.


These are some of the words said by different people at different time but they all have one thing in common, each one of them is someone who is manipulative, who is hurting someone else emotionally, denying them love, making them feel less, being downright abusive or trying to put blame of their bad behavior on other person.  

Manipulators are very successful in convincing the person who is the victim that they are the problem.and confusing them.

The victim starts doubting their reality, they feel bad and hurt and blamed and ignored all the time but the twisted words and explanation and gestures of the abuser make them doubt what they are experiencing.

This can break them completely. They continue being abused but can be less and less assertive towards it. They start being seen as the problem by others too. They lose interest in work, lose confidence and happiness and become more and more depressed many times.

At IWill, we have many therapy clients who are people who have been living around a manipulator, they know they are being broken but the layers of manipulation, the fear of what ifs and a broken self esteem makes them vulnerable.

We help them first regain the strength, acknowledge their hurt and experiences as real and then further help them assert, have space for self, boundaries.

Many assert, stand for their truth and not being manipulated and broken anymore, build their careers up and life and become Resilient, reclaiming their reality and their space to be themselves.

Manipulation and breaking a person by gaslighting, is extremely toxic and isolating, therapy can help overcome, have space for self, get courage to have social network again and stop the abuse and it's justification.

It's not ok to be denied self worth and not ok to be attacked for someone's bad behavior

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