IWill

IWill 2024-03-20 04:07 - 2 minute read

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Son that supports his wife becomes most disliked and suffers isolation. MY STORY

Anupam Sharma

Suddenly Rumors about me started spreading.

I have changed and I am the worst son I started listening.

My property rights snatched away. Invitation to home functions not anymore.

My dignity tattered, status of being "The son" of the house taken away.

Why? Why you may ask? What bad things did I do? 

How did I neglect my family?

I must be an evil son!

Well none of it!

I had a love marriage and I loved my wife a lot. Initially that wasn't liked. She was said things like not a good fit for our family, everything she did say and do was a problem.

She was a woman of her own mind and powerful, and that was a problem!

 

When exactly my mother too was a woman of her own mind all her life. But she just couldn't tolerate my wife being one.

Initially due to risk of hurting my family, or my naivety, I started ignoring my wife.

I started being sad myself, away from my wife, challenging her freedom to make others comfortable.

 

But she got depressed, and so Did I. She got unhappy and so did I.

I married her for bliss, for love and here she was being stripped of her dignity, always made to feel negative for being just herself, and for expecting love from me.

 

We took IWill therapy to fix our couple issues and it became clear to me that I cannot make my wife feel unloved because someone is uncomfortable.

For Proving to be a good son, I can't allow toxicity and downright abuse of my wife.

 

I tried to talk, persuade but nothing changed and that just ensured that it won't change and when I stood up for right, for my wife, and ensured that I don't ignore her, that I contribute in her career but also STAND FOR MYSELF AND MY DREAMS, everyone started disowning me.

 

My family disowned the son! The abuse of son is real too! And it happens when he gives love to his wife.

Sorry that we are the same land where Parvati and Shiv are celebrated and Radha and Krishna are gods but a son who loves his wife is a villain and the innocent wife, is seen as inhumane, worse than evil no matter how much she does for the family.

 

Still in therapy, I have healed from even this too. It's a new kind of abuse that we as men face and world doesn't want to talk about it yet.

If we have career desires, away from what is expected we are bad

If we have love for our spouses, we are bad.

 

We are only good if we toe the line

 World is not fair to a son who is a MAN! 

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