Worst pain is to be with people who cant see you happy
When I got a new promotion, I was instantly compared with someone else who just had a much bigger raise.
If I looked beautiful and someone would appreciate it, everyone around would just feel threatened and bad for this praise.
If I would getting attention, everyone would get disturbed because of that.
No one wants to see you succeed, no one is excited when you win. There is always a comparison or manipulation of how success is artificially making someone else feel small or less!
I lived with these people. And they were really impacting my self-confidence.
I was constantly attacked when I did something and I would be always made to feel like my happiness didn’t matter, they would even visibly get uncomfortable and jealous!
It was the worst feeling ever.
I always lived with people who would feel happy when I was happy, who would encourage me when I was down, who would unconditionally love me and even encourage others to take care of me!
It felt like home! It felt comforting! But now I had come to a point where I just was restless, angry, full of hurt, saddened with discrimination all the time!
I joined IWill therapy just to lessen my pain have someone to talk to and here in IWill therapy, I and my therapist worked on my boundaries! I started asserting them, even when I lived in the same place. Not everyone had the right to poke nose in my affairs! I learned to ignore them when they were getting insecure... I found a way to reconnect with people who loved me and also stand up and speak when I was being attacked!
I learned to take care of myself! I learned to make my safe distance even let other people know I wasn’t there available for their bad behavior. I also made it a point to assertively call out their hypocrisy!
I am winning again, I have people who encourage me! How these people see me, I don’t care... I have my boundaries and I assert them! I don’t break myself and my wishes to look good in those people’s books who are just not good to me or want my happiness!
For therapy at IWill, you just need to download the app. The app instantly starts with an assessment, a basis on which you would be matched to a therapist and program that works for you. Just book, pay and start sessions online!